autotelic, autistic, assonance-hole©.

Looming Lullaby

I remember your insistence
on silence and distance
laughingly, I look back
castigating myself as a fool
Another secret,
hidden in plain sight
I stumbled around it;
barking shins and stubbing toes
called it “yours” and thought
it was an impediment, obstacle;
Such amusing humanity, this;
as if such things are possible
and all the spaces inbetween
are not filled to overflowing
as if I was not bouncing
all around you, ignorantly.
I remember the moment that
it all became clear to me;
no recrimination, no regret,
just that little, bemused, “Oh.”
I carry you in my mental pocket;
a glowing, warm piece of amber
I see you in spring meadows
feel you in summer’s warmth,
cradle you in autumn’s cooling,
and tuck you into winter’s sleep
until the next cycle, the next season
No separation exists; we entwine
All of this, casually (causally?) close
In the night, in my dreaming,
I shift to make you room and know
you do the same for me
As do we all, each and every one
This chaotically woven blanket,
filled with knots and connections
is a comforting and welcomed weight;
I nestle in my little weft and smile,
smoothing the edges I perceive,
thankful even for those I still cannot;
the soft sounds of the shuttle and loom
have become my favorite lullaby